Ever watched a movie or read a book that left you in tears? One that pulled on your heartstrings and stirred your emotions. Or one that left you feeling inspired, challenged and motivated to do more with what you have been blessed with. I do read a lot and have a good fair movies that have had that effect on me but I will not list them here because this post really isn’t about scripted movies and novels. Books and films do take us into other worlds and these worlds do sometimes have the ability to inspire, sadden or draw on the compassionate side of our being.I will come back to the books and movies at a later stage but for now, allow me to rewind the years a bit to certain events in the not-so-distant past.
The month was December and the year was 2004. I had just had my first baby. I remember switching on the telly and being greeted with news that left me in tears and struggling to fully comprehend the magnitude of this particular catastrophe. A tsunami had mercilessly swept through Indonesia. The devastation and loss of human lives was unimaginable.
It is never possible to accurately predict the damage that an impending storm will leave behind before it actually hits. Over a year ago we watched in horror as a massive earthquake wrecked havoc and destruction of an unimaginable magnitude in Haiti. We watched as devastated and wounded people searched through the rubble for their loved ones, young and old. Most of us watched honestly kind of helplessly wondering how and what we could do to help or at least alleviate the suffering for the survivors of this tragedy. Would they have the backbone to cope with the pain and trauma of surviving such a blow from nature. A few days later,while the survivors were still trying to wake themselves up from what they were hoping was just a nightmare,there were aftershocks,as if to give them that pinch to let them know that they really were awake. More devastation followed upon the already wounded and weeping land.Yet again,the survivors wondered if they would make it through, given what they had endured and experienced in the first incident.Many lives were lost, many others wounded. It was as if there was an invisible hand strangling the life out of the precious souls of this land.
Since then there have been more natural disasters spread around the world :earthquakes,tsunamis,fires,cyclones and floods which have left their imprints on not just the land but on the physical, emotional, spiritual and financial spheres of people all across the globe. Because of the scale of damage from these natural disasters, they have grabbed the attention of the world and caused those even in the unaffected areas to stop and ponder on the fleeting nature of our earthly lives as well as arousing compassion...that stirring that comes naturally to a human being when confronted by or witnessing another go through turmoils of different kinds.
The truth is that there are less obvious ‘quakes’ that though hidden, still leave devastation and never quite grab the world’s attention. These tsunamis and quakes are of varying magnitudes. Quakes big enough to cause devastation of a great scale but not visible enough to bring news crews rushing in with the lights and cameras. Natural disasters come uninvited, as do some of these ‘disasters’.They are tremors that shake 'billions of worlds'...as many worlds as there are people on this earth.Sometimes they are so concealed, so secretive and yet so intense that they leave the victims wounded and dead within. Yes, it takes less than death to steal a life.In this world troubles will come. Without the grace and mercy of God people do crumble under the weight of these ‘tremors’.
In nursing, the pulse is used to check overall heart and health fitness levels physically. In view of the individual and personal quakes that are intense enough to be able to steal life and crush the spirit ,when was the last time you checked the ‘pulse’ of someone in your world and shined your light on them? Do you notice when someone is struggling to build endurance or when they are engulfed by the waters of inward tsunamis but with no news crews waiting by to highlight their plight? Do you feel stirred when you see someone who is overcome by the feeling of standing on sinking sand? Or is all this obscured by the veil of busyness? Are you too ‘busy’ to the point that you are too deaf to the cries of loneliness and blind to the needs around you. The people around you matter. If some of their life stories were to be replayed on the big screen, you would probably reach out for the Kleenex or give them a standing ovation. Only a handful of stories make it to the movies out of the billions of real life scripts that are being penned everyday.
Take time to check on the pulse of those around you.Do they still have a healthy heartbeat in their soul or are they silently dying inside while wearing a smile in an attempt to mask the death within? Are you awake and aware of those around you, the people that you have been blessed with on the journey of life? Make yourself available to encourage, strengthen and cheer others on without judgement. Allow people to be comfortable enough to expose themselves without the fear of you exposing them but protecting and praying for them instead. Be sensitive and discerning enough to notice the ‘tremors’ in their worlds and see beyond the facades.
Do away with unproductive 'busyness' and stay away from sterilized philosophies that have 'zero' heart in them.If a movie or a book can make you cry, if news of human tragedies all over the world can make you stop, ponder and feel for those affected, then you do have a heart. Take time to read the pages being written by the people around you and listen to their stories. If you feel hardened,pray for compassion and tenderness because someone within your sphere of influence needs you give them a standing ovation or encourage them. There are more than a billion tremors in the world and each person can do something, however little to strengthen and build others up.
Today take time to say a prayer for someone you know is in need of raindrops from heaven.
Love and blessings to you all
Thursday 21 July 2011
Friday 1 July 2011
Rocking The Cradle
Giving birth is painful (thank you Eve!). However, there is something magical about the arrival of a new-born baby. When I had my babies, each delivery left me with a myriad of positive emotions, emotions that I can only describe as torrential waves of a pure and intense kind of love which flooded my entire heart and my whole being. Instinctively, I knew without a shadow of doubt that I loved these little bundles-of-joy so much that I would be willing to do whatever it took to for me to nurture them into their full potential. These emotions, so strong and so tangible often left me thinking of my own mother and realising that I, too, at one point, was a newborn baby in the hands of my mother. For most women, giving birth will often kindle or rekindle an appreciation of their mums through new eyes. In fact, everyone you see, from the wealthiest to the poorest, from the biggest to the tiniest started out in this world as a baby.
Babies give their love unconditionally. Their love is pure, their innocence is untainted and they carry a freshness and a purity. Babies do not know or care if you are wealthy or poor. They have no perception of poverty or wealth and therefore respond from a position of clarity, innocence and love. They do not worry about how they look or how the grown-ups around them look. They love and just want to be loved. It’s no wonder that when people come into the presence of newborns they ‘ooooo’ and ‘aaaaaa’ at this new creation. But alas, they do not stay as babies. They grow and it takes a lot of wisdom, patience and grace to raise these little babies and nurture the gifts within them so they can flourish into responsible and successful God fearing adults.
From as far back as I can remember I always adored babies and would find myself pondering on the mysteriousness of how these little adorable bundles came into being. In fact the earliest memory I have is of my little brother's birth. I was only three years old when mum and dad brought him home and I remember being so smitten by his tiny little fingers and everything about him. That was me back then and I should say I still have not outgrown my love for babies and children. I have my own children now and I’m thankful for the wealth and abundance of information and resources available to us to aide us in our parenting.
As our society continues to evolve and grow, more and more options for self development and progression have become available to most people. As the choices broaden, so too do the debates and arguments as to whether or not each person is doing the right thing or making the right choice. Mothering is no exception and more often than not I meet women who are burdened with fear, guilt and worry because they do not know whether they are making the right decision in as far as raising their children is concerned. Is there a ‘one size fits all’ method of being a ‘good’ mother? How do we fulfil and honour that initial desire that we had when we held our babies for the first time, that desire to do our best to raise happy and responsible kids?
In my journey the ‘one size fits all’ method that I do know about is Scripture. You see, all Scripture is God breathed and is useful for teaching, correcting, training and protecting as well as equipping us and our children for every good work in this fascinating journey of life and all that comes with it. . As mothers (and fathers), we have the great honour and privilege of providing input, management and direction into this new being’s brand new start! When we get a revelation of what an opportunity it is to share in these divine moments and opportunities and when we realise the enormity of the responsibility we carry, parenting becomes such an honour, a joy and a privilege.
In recent times, I have known many a mother (and father) who either carries or is driven by the “guilt” of not being able to spend “enough” time with their children. Focusing a little on the mothers for now, the decision to either be a working mum or to “live off one salary” and be a stay-at-home mum features highly in the lives of many mothers as it is sometimes almost viewed as a choice between your children and your vocation. There is no shortage of debates and research on this matter but the question still remains - Is there an umbrella or universal formula that should work for all mothers? I do not think there could ever be one magical universal formula or approach just as there cannot be a universal personality for all mankind.
Some women are wired naturally as “traditional” nurturers who find purpose and fulfilment in having and nurturing children – the future of mankind. They find joy and happiness in this role and will often feel enhanced by executing the role to the very best of their God-given ability. Nowadays, the traditional nurturing mothers are not necessarily correctly portrayed and at times are demeaned as being frumpy-looking, unkempt, ignorant, uneducated and severely overweight women with old over-starched Mother’s Day aprons secured and locked around their waists. In my travels, I have had the great pleasure of meeting numerous very intelligent, highly educated and professionally qualified, compassionate, socially aware women who have made the decision to be in this category and to follow this path more because it is their passion rather than because it is the natural or “expected” thing for them to do.
On the other hand, there are those mothers who deeply love their children but who are also very driven and enhanced by activities outside the mothering and home arena. In some cases, these women will feel claustrophobic, emotionally strained and suffocated if not given the space and opportunities to fulfil their hearts’ desire: which is to see the talent and abilities that they carry outside of the home fulfilled. Then of course there are those women who are able to combine both worlds with relative ease and finesse…maybe and just maybe… sometimes with a tinge of guilt but generally they feel fulfilled in what they do and how they live..
And so we are back again to the beginning: is there a ‘right way’ of being a mother when it comes to lifestyle choices? The ‘right way’ for each mother should be determined by what feels right for her and her family in whatever season of their lives that they find themselves. This one thing I do know though – that without this one specific universal ingredient, no method will succeed…ever – and that is the ingredient of love. As I shared before, whatever your faith, pray for your little ones, love them and whether you are a stay-at-home mum, businesswoman, career woman with a family to raise or whatever else you may be involved in, remember that God will furnish you thoroughly to fulfil all the good works you have been commissioned to do…only ask. Do the very best that you can, with what you have and without comparing yourself with anyone else. Rather, encourage and cheer others on as we all continue on this great journey together.
Till next time…
Babies give their love unconditionally. Their love is pure, their innocence is untainted and they carry a freshness and a purity. Babies do not know or care if you are wealthy or poor. They have no perception of poverty or wealth and therefore respond from a position of clarity, innocence and love. They do not worry about how they look or how the grown-ups around them look. They love and just want to be loved. It’s no wonder that when people come into the presence of newborns they ‘ooooo’ and ‘aaaaaa’ at this new creation. But alas, they do not stay as babies. They grow and it takes a lot of wisdom, patience and grace to raise these little babies and nurture the gifts within them so they can flourish into responsible and successful God fearing adults.
From as far back as I can remember I always adored babies and would find myself pondering on the mysteriousness of how these little adorable bundles came into being. In fact the earliest memory I have is of my little brother's birth. I was only three years old when mum and dad brought him home and I remember being so smitten by his tiny little fingers and everything about him. That was me back then and I should say I still have not outgrown my love for babies and children. I have my own children now and I’m thankful for the wealth and abundance of information and resources available to us to aide us in our parenting.
As our society continues to evolve and grow, more and more options for self development and progression have become available to most people. As the choices broaden, so too do the debates and arguments as to whether or not each person is doing the right thing or making the right choice. Mothering is no exception and more often than not I meet women who are burdened with fear, guilt and worry because they do not know whether they are making the right decision in as far as raising their children is concerned. Is there a ‘one size fits all’ method of being a ‘good’ mother? How do we fulfil and honour that initial desire that we had when we held our babies for the first time, that desire to do our best to raise happy and responsible kids?
In my journey the ‘one size fits all’ method that I do know about is Scripture. You see, all Scripture is God breathed and is useful for teaching, correcting, training and protecting as well as equipping us and our children for every good work in this fascinating journey of life and all that comes with it. . As mothers (and fathers), we have the great honour and privilege of providing input, management and direction into this new being’s brand new start! When we get a revelation of what an opportunity it is to share in these divine moments and opportunities and when we realise the enormity of the responsibility we carry, parenting becomes such an honour, a joy and a privilege.
In recent times, I have known many a mother (and father) who either carries or is driven by the “guilt” of not being able to spend “enough” time with their children. Focusing a little on the mothers for now, the decision to either be a working mum or to “live off one salary” and be a stay-at-home mum features highly in the lives of many mothers as it is sometimes almost viewed as a choice between your children and your vocation. There is no shortage of debates and research on this matter but the question still remains - Is there an umbrella or universal formula that should work for all mothers? I do not think there could ever be one magical universal formula or approach just as there cannot be a universal personality for all mankind.
Some women are wired naturally as “traditional” nurturers who find purpose and fulfilment in having and nurturing children – the future of mankind. They find joy and happiness in this role and will often feel enhanced by executing the role to the very best of their God-given ability. Nowadays, the traditional nurturing mothers are not necessarily correctly portrayed and at times are demeaned as being frumpy-looking, unkempt, ignorant, uneducated and severely overweight women with old over-starched Mother’s Day aprons secured and locked around their waists. In my travels, I have had the great pleasure of meeting numerous very intelligent, highly educated and professionally qualified, compassionate, socially aware women who have made the decision to be in this category and to follow this path more because it is their passion rather than because it is the natural or “expected” thing for them to do.
On the other hand, there are those mothers who deeply love their children but who are also very driven and enhanced by activities outside the mothering and home arena. In some cases, these women will feel claustrophobic, emotionally strained and suffocated if not given the space and opportunities to fulfil their hearts’ desire: which is to see the talent and abilities that they carry outside of the home fulfilled. Then of course there are those women who are able to combine both worlds with relative ease and finesse…maybe and just maybe… sometimes with a tinge of guilt but generally they feel fulfilled in what they do and how they live..
And so we are back again to the beginning: is there a ‘right way’ of being a mother when it comes to lifestyle choices? The ‘right way’ for each mother should be determined by what feels right for her and her family in whatever season of their lives that they find themselves. This one thing I do know though – that without this one specific universal ingredient, no method will succeed…ever – and that is the ingredient of love. As I shared before, whatever your faith, pray for your little ones, love them and whether you are a stay-at-home mum, businesswoman, career woman with a family to raise or whatever else you may be involved in, remember that God will furnish you thoroughly to fulfil all the good works you have been commissioned to do…only ask. Do the very best that you can, with what you have and without comparing yourself with anyone else. Rather, encourage and cheer others on as we all continue on this great journey together.
Till next time…
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